


this isn't me (i won't allow it)

by squishychan



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Abortion, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Drug Addiction, Eating Disorders, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Heavy Angst, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Miscarriage, Omega Verse, Past Abuse, Self-Harm, Suicidal Thoughts, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-04
Updated: 2018-05-13
Packaged: 2019-03-26 19:34:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 8
Words: 8,782
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13864539
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/squishychan/pseuds/squishychan
Summary: there's nothing wrong with omegas, no, not at allit's just seungcheol would rather not be onefor reasons best left unsaid





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> this story is basically an everyone is suffering story
> 
> and babies

Hansol was curled on the sofa, the other members had gone out for a night of partying and clubbing, leaving him with the dorm all to himself. Of course they’d offered, but with his heat steadily approaching, he’d politely declined. Well, he had no choice when Seungkwan started growling about crusty ass fuck boys trying to mate with him and such. He found the older always got a tad possessive when he was nearing his "time of the month", as Minghao put it, knowing it pissed off their oldest omega, Jun. Instead opting to read Soonyoung’s issues of  _Naruto_ and munch on doritos.

 

Dog-earing the manga, he got up to throw away his now empty bag of doritos when he smelt the scent of another omega in the air.  _Butterscotch and twix, he thought, the trademark scent of-wait, what?_

 

That was the scent of their cuddly and adorable doe-eyed leader, their  _beta_  leader. And by judging by the thick, heavy scent of pheromones, Seungcheol was going into heat. Wait, what if this was his first heat? Who would help him through it? First heats were known for being notoriously brutal, just ask him, he knew from experience. Hansol knew that Jun would be more than willing to share his toys and whatnot, and he was well aware that Mingyu had a knotting toy that he'd happily hand over to Seungcheol, but suppressants were a completely different story. Seeing as every omega is different, they couldn't share, He had even heard horror stories of omegas that had shared and suffered from doing so. Which meant Seungcheol would have to ride out his heat, full force. Hansol winced at the thought, occurring to him that he probably should inform the pack of this.

 

Panicking (in his defense, he had no idea how everyone would take this, for all he knew, they could be angry about Seungcheol being an omega), he opened the group chat with shaking fingers.

 

**[ 10:47 PM ]**

 

 **hansolie~♡:**  help pls

 

 **LAboi:**  is something wrong sol?

 

 **angel:**  ^

 

 **kwanniebear:**  did you start your cycle? do we need to come home? are you okay???

 

 **hansolie~♡:**  i’m fine babe but is cheolie still with you guys?

 

 **literalbaby:** um idk

 

 **sunshineseok:** no solie, he went back to the dorm. he said he didn't feel too well. poor cheolie :(

 

 **hansolie~♡:** yeah about that...

 

 **angel:** hansol? what's wrong? is seungcheol okay?

 

 **hansolie~♡:** um i don't know how to explain it?

 

 **angel:** well fucking try!

 

 **kwanniebear:** don't speak to him like that jeonghan!

 

 **angel:** shit i'm sorry hansol, i shouldn't have snapped

 

 **hansolie~♡:** it's fine hannie, i understand. seungkwan would do the same, dumb alpha

 

 **kwanniebear:** solie!

 

 **hansolie~♡:** but your my dumb alpha kwannie~♡

 

 **icravedeath:** *you're

 

 **fuckingtree:** shut up hao. can't you see that there having a moment

 

 **icravedeath:** *they're 

 

 **emo:** smh

  

 **tinysatan:** that's sweet and all, but about seungcheol?

 

 **hansolie~♡:** oh! about that, he's in heat!

 

→

 

Jeonghan drops his phone when he reads Hansol's message, however he can say that he isn't shocked about said fact, seeing as he already knew about Seungcheol's little (well not so little now that he actually thought about it) secret. He quickly snatches it back up and starts walking briskly out of the bar. He knows the others can smell the fear seeping into his cinnamon and nutmeg scent, clearly telling them to just leave him alone. He pushes past the crowd of betas, omegas, and alphas, nearing the exit, when he feels a hand grab at his own. Jeonghan's mind is clouded with the instinct to just run home and protect his omega, so he struggles in the tight grasp. He turns to snap at the person, but when he's met with the hard glare of Jihoon, the words burn out on his tongue.

 

"Calm down Jeonghan, you're making Junhui upset!" The shorter alpha hissed, scowl on his face. Jeonghan can smell fear on him too, see the worry swimming in Jihoon's dark eyes.  _Even Jihoonie-ah is worried about Seungcheolie, and he's even being somewhat open about his feelings. How are the others taking it then?_ Jeongan lets his thoughts stray before struggling against Jihoon's vice-like grip, but the older's attempts are proven to be futile.

 

"Let go of me Lee Jihoon! I have to get out of here! I-" Jeonghan's angry rant is cut short when Jihoon pulls him down and nuzzles into his scent gland, which rather effectively shuts him up in a second. He whines and bats at the younger, but doesn't resist anymore. Seemingly pleased with that, Jihoon drags him back over to their pack, who crowd him and scent him, calming the oldest alpha down further.

 

"Do you feel better now hyung?" Chan, the youngest beta, asks. Still pumping out the tangy scent of fresh marmalade, Chan flashes Jeonghan a tight lipped smile. To which he tries to return, but it most likely comes out as a pained grimace.

 

"Much." Jeonghan lies through his teeth, not even actually caring if the others pick up on it. They probably do if he's being honest. He just wants to head back to the dorm, where he knows Seungcheol is,  _his_ Seungcheol.

 

"Don't lie to us hyung, we can literally smell your fear." Soonyoung piped up, pushing himself into the crook of Jeonghan's neck, the older's senses being invaded by the omegas unique scent of firewood, a typically alpha scent. He sighed and wrapped his arms around Soonyoung, pressing a kiss to the younger's temple.

 

"No fair Jeonghannie-hyung~! I wanna kiss too!" Seungkwan whines, cheeks puffed up in mock jealousy (or maybe real? One could never tell with the over affectionate alpha). It's clear to the others that Seungkwan was trying to lighten the mood, never having faired well with ill emotions in the pack dynamic. Whatever Seungkwan's intentions were, they helped bring a smile to Jeonghan's face. He's about to tackle the other alpha in a hug, when his phone buzzes.

 

****[ 11:19 PM ]** **

 

 ** **hansolie~ **♡:****** hannie

 

 **hansolie~ **♡:**  **jeonghan

 

 **hansolie~ **♡:**  **hyung

 

 **hansolie~ **♡:**  **please answer please answer please answer please hyung please

 

 **angel:** shit shit oh god is everything okay hansol? oh please answer 

 

 **hansolie~ **♡:**  **hyung im so scared and im shaking what do i do about cheol??

 

Jeonghan watches as the rest of the pack check the group chat, the smell of fear now everywhere. He sees Jun's smile slip, and how Mingyu's tanned complexion goes deathly pale. He hears Jihoon curse under his breath, with Jisoo muttering something in English before pocketing his phone. Jeonghan wants to comfort his pack, but he just  _can't_ form words and his throat feels like it's stuffed with cotton and-

 

****[ 11:23 PM ]** **

 

 ** ** **hansolie~ **♡:******** PLEASE COME HOME HE'S BLEEDINGH 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you guys so much for the sweet comments~  
> oh! here are the boys sub genders!
> 
> alpha - jeonghan, jisoo, wonwoo, jihoon, minghao, and seungkwan
> 
> beta - seokmin??? ( i really don't know if i want him to be that, he kinda screams omega to me ) and chan ( he has yet to present, so by default, he's beta )
> 
> omega - seungcheol, jun, soonyoung, mingyu, and hansol

Jeonghan bangs open the dorm door, chest heaving and out of breath. He hears the footsteps of the others behind him, shoes squeaking on the mahogany hardwood. He smells the sense of overwhelming mixed in with Hansol's sugary scent of cream puffs, making his heart clench. Poor kid must be on the brink of a breakdown. He's actually surprised that he  _himself_  hasn't. 

 

"Jeonghan! He's in the bathroom, Hansol is with him. He-he..." Wonwoo's deep voice cuts out, making the older alpha's head whip up. The sight that greets him is unexpected to say the least. The normally stoic male's face is flushed and his body language just screams  _'help'_. Jeonghan wastes no time in running past the younger, mumbling a chaste 'thanks', not caring if Wonwoo replied or even heard for that matter.

 

←

 

Seungcheol is seated in the cool water of the bath Hansol had run for him, with the younger omega currently attempting to feed him at the moment. 

 

“Seungcheol,  _please_ eat,” He gently coaxes, bringing the strawberry up to the older’s lips. Seungcheol turns his head and whines, adamant on not letting the red fruit pass his lips. Hansol sighs and puts it back in the packaging, setting the container down with a soft thump.

 

“Why won’t you eat Cheol-ah?” Hansol quietly asks, the question hanging heavy in the thick air. He can count all the older male’s ribs, see the bumpy ridges of his spine, his collarbones dipping inward, and his hip bones jutting out, and it makes Hansol’s skin crawl. He’s _too_ skinny.

 

Seungcheol doesn’t respond, just wrinkles his nose in disgust, seemingly at the sight of his body.  _His much too thin body._

 

Seungcheol’s dark eyes drift over to the container of strawberries. His stomach twists at the sight, he really wants to eat one, but he  _can’t_. There’s just too many calories in them,  _four calories too many._

 

Hansol clears his throat, Seungcheol’s attention is once again focused on the younger omega. He murmurs something in english, before finally opening his mouth.

 

“Why didn’t you tell us you were an omega? And why in the world did you take beta hormones when you-are-were-“ Hansol pauses, unsure if he should continue his sentence.

 

Seungcheol looks at him with sad eyes, tilting his head in confusion. “Why wouldn’t I not?” He whispers, fingers toying with one of Chan’s yellow rubber duckies. 

 

“Huh? What?” Hansol doesn’t understand, eyebrows furrowed slightly. He‘s about to say something, but a sharp knock on the door interrupts him. Hansol goes to stand, but Seungcheol pulls him back down. 

 

“Stay,  _please_ ,” He pleads, voice small and needy. Hansol nods and presses a kiss to Seungcheol’s forehead, before taking out his phone. 

 

**[ 11:49 PM ]**

 

 **hansolie~♡:**  shua

 

 **LAboi:**  yeah sol?

 

 **hansolie~♡:**  come get jeonghan pls

 

 **kwanniebear:**  is cheolie okay? are u okay? do i need to fite someone???

 

 **literalbaby:**  u disgust me kwannie-hyung

 

 **tinysatan:**  plz just go get hannie jisoo 

 

 **angel:** did you fuckers forget that im in this shitty chat as well? and try to stop me bitch 

 

 **emo:** is cheol doing better now hansol? 

 

 **hansolie~♡:** yeah i got the bleeding to stop and now he’s gonna be fine, he just needs to rest

 

 **sunshineseok:**  hey sol?

 

 **hansolie~♡:**  yeah minnie 

 

 **sunshineseok:**  why was seungcheol bleeding? he didn’t...

 

 **hansolie~♡:**   Ah no! it’s nothing to worry about minnie, his body just couldn’t take on a heat 

 

 **junebug:** we can see you writing and then deleting hansol. what’s really wrong with seungcheol 

 

 **hansolie~♡:**  he’s been taking beta hormones and it fucked his body and his cycle up and yeah im scared 

 

 **fuckingtree:** do you need us to come in? 

 

 **soonie:**  me and jun are on our way now. R u coming two gyu???

 

 **fuckingtree:**  sí

 

 **junebug:**  and you better let us in

 

←

 

Jisoo, Jun, Soonyoung, and Mingyu race down the hallway, bare feet padding against the floor softly. They reach the end of the hall, where they’re met with the sight of Jeonghan pacing outside the bathroom door. Jisoo wastes no time in dragging the older alpha away, said alpha having none of it. 

 

“Let go! I have to see him Jisoo! I  _need_  to see him, I-” Jeonghan snarls, but suddenly stops, eyes glazing over. He slumps into Jisoo with a groan, which has the younger alarmed.  _Please tell me he’s not going into rut._  His phone buzzes and he checks it, while stroking Jeonghan’s sweat slicked locks.  _Yep, definitely going into rut._

 

**[ 12:04 AM ]**

 

 **emo:**  do you need some help holding hannie down? we can hear him flipping his shit from the living room

 

 **LAboi:**  he’s going into rut guys

 

 **tinysatan:**  fuck

 

 **kwanniebear:**  fuk

 

 **LAboi:**  fuck is right

 

←

 

Hansol can hear the commotion going on just outside the door and it pisses him off. Seungcheol’s shifting uncomfortably in the fluffy towel Hansol had wrapped him in, obviously put off by the oldest alpha’s presence. Hansol can smell the musky scent of pheromones in the air, flooding his senses and he wants to scream. Dumb _ass_  alphas.

 

The air lifts as Jeonghan is pulled away, and the pure and soothing scent of omegas replaces it. 

 

“Hansol, can we come in?” It’s Mingyu’s voice that says it, and it soothes Hansol’s frazzled nerves considerably. He looks to Seungcheol, who smiles at him. “Just a minute hyung,” He replies, helping Seungcheol to slip into boxers, still a tad weak from the blood loss. 

 

Once Seungcheol is covered enough to be deemed presentable, Hansol opens the door a crack, peering out at the three other omegas. He smiles weakly, before letting them in. 

 

Soonyoung rushes over to the now oldest omega, brushing Seungcheol’s raven hair out of his eyes. Soonyoung frowns when Seungcheol flinches at the small gesture, eyes cast downward on the fuzzy bath mat. His bites his lip and digs his fingernails into his forearm, leaving crescent shapes marks. Soonyoung gently pries Seungcheol's hands off, glancing at the purple and blue bruises littering his skin. He tears his eyes away, finding it all  _too_ much. _They_ _had all assumed Seungcheol had stopped_. He sees Jun shoot Hansol a look of concern, the younger mouthing something that he can't quite make out. 

 

"Hyung...I thought-we thought you had-" Mingyu attempts, but trails off, a deep frown on his face. They stand in silence, the bathroom clock's ticking being the only sound heard, thumping loud and clear against the stark nothingness. Hansol gingerly takes Seungcheol's wrist, pulling it under the cool tap water of the sink, rubbing ointment onto the bruises and lone scrapes littered here and there. He doesn't say a word during this,  _words simply aren't enough._ The silence stretches, until finally it snaps under pressure, and the oldest omega makes a soft noise in the back of his throat. 

 

“Don’t you guys hate me now? I fucking destroyed my body! Why are you treating me kindly? You should kick me out of the pack! I don’t deserve it, you shouldn't-you shouldn't,” Seungcheol whispers, but it steadily becomes louder, growing and growing as his emotions spill out, his face flushing in shame and anger. His eyes are wide and unfocused, brimming with unshed tears. 

 

Mingyu moves to comfort Seungcheol, but the older suddenly lets out a shrill yelp, clutching his stomach. And that’s when they all notice the smell, everything clicking into place.

 

_Seungcheol’s body is trying to go into heat, not realizing that he’s already pregnant._


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm sorry for the severe lack of updates ;-;

Seungcheol can see Mingyu's mouth moving, syllables being stressed here and there, but he  _can't_  hear a word, or even a sound for that matter. And it  _really_  fucking messes with him. He can feel as heart rate increases, beating frantically against his ribcage, and surely his blood pressure is rising, which can't be good for-  _for the pup._

 

_His pup._

 

And just like that, it suddenly becomes real. Which is _too_  much, too much to take in - too much to comprehend -  _just too much_ , and Seungcheol just  _can't_ take it. Blood is roaring in his ears, and his heart  _hurts_. Hell,  _everything hurts_. It hurts and he just wants it to  _stop_.  _For it all to stop._

→

 

Jisoo feels as his mate collapses, and judging by the small whimper Jeonghan lets out, he's somehow aware too, despite being smack dab in the middle of his rut. Jeonghan pushes Jisoo off his sweaty body, thighs trembling in a post orgasmic haze. They're both terribly sticky, and it's obvious that Jeonghan isn't satisfied, but when it comes to their lovely omega, he's seemingly willing to sacrifice his needs.

 

"Ch-Cheol, he-g-go to him 'Shua. Ch-Check on-on him," The older alpha stutters, hips bucking upward, craving touch oh so badly. He scrunches his pretty face, breathy whines and groans leaving his lips. Jisoo moves to stroke Jeonghan's leaking cock, but the older bats his hand away weakly. "N-No, _Cheolie_ -"

 

Jisoo sighs, "Alright, fine. But don't bitch at me later on, claiming that I neglected you." He replies, using the rag on their bedside table to wipe off the cum coating his lower stomach. He slips on a t-shirt that hangs loosely down to his mid-thigh (probably Mingyu's if he's guessing), fumbling as he tugs on a pair of boxers. "You sure Hannie? I can stay here with you-"

 

"No! Get your ass over to our Cheolie this instant!" Jeonghan snaps, clenching his thighs together tightly, breathing heavily. His pupils are blown out, but the firm glare he's giving Jisoo shows that he's regained some control over his senses, reverting (if only for a minute or so) to the typical Jeonghan he knows.

 

He chuckles, pressing a kiss to Jeonghan's temple. "I'll be back babe, don't you dare touch yourself until I return~!" Jisoo singsongs, cheekily winking as his mate.

 

Jeonghan promptly flips him off.

 

→

 

Jun watches Seungcheol’s chest rise and fall, the omega’s breath coming out in soft puffs. His heart twists painfully as he can count all of the older's ribs poking out from underneath the pale skin. It hurts ten times worse when he catches a glimpse of pearly pink scars crisscrossing the older's hips, with some of them an angry red, clearly recent.

 

But he doesn't dare cry, no, he has to be strong for the younger omegas. It's usually Seungcheol's job, to be the mother hen of the group, caring for betas, omegas, and alphas alike. Though the bond that the oldest omega shared with the younger omegas was much stronger when compared to the other sub genders, thicker than blood even. One that Jun has no chance of replicating. But he has no choice but to try, to try as if his life depended on it. _He has to._

 

"Junnie, please don't beat yourself up over this. We didn't know he was suffering, we simply never had a reason to believe so. I know you want to blame yourself, hell, I'm currently waging war inside my own mind, but please don't. It's not our fault." Mingyu whispers, and Jun whips his head around to see the tall omega standing warily in the doorframe. He looks frightened, normally honey-golden skin an off color snow white. Jun gestures for the younger to come over to the makeshift nest he hastily put together, Mingyu ducking his head as he steps in the room.

 

They sit in silence for a while, frowning when Seungcheol whimpers in his sleep, tossing fitfully. Jun feels tears pricking at his eyes, but he holds them in. Then Seungcheol lets out a sob, trembling underneath the fuzzy blankets that were so lovingly placed on his feverish frame. Mingyu turns to him with wide eyes, unsure of what they should do. Finally Jun sighs, and tentatively reaching a hand out to shake Seungcheol awake.

 

"Cheolie, it's okay, you're okay," Jun soothes, stroking Seungcheol's cheek gently. Seungcheol's eyes flutter slightly, his nose twitching too. 

 

"Hmn? J-Junnie? Where am I?" Seungcheol groggily asks, eyes blearily taking in his surroundings. He tries to push his body into a sitting position, but he's far too drained to. So he slumps against the numerous pillows lining the nest, flushed with embarrassment (or that could merely be his fever, Jun isn't sure). It honestly hurts to see their doe-eyed leader in such an unhealthy condition.

 

"You're in the nest hyung, we placed you here after you fainted." Mingyu explains, seeing how Seungcheol's shoulders stiffen upon sudden realization.

 

"I-I fainted? W-Why?" Seungcheol meekly says, causing Mingyu and Jun to share a look. 

 

Should they share what they knew with him? Does Seungcheol know that the pack now knows about his unhealthy habits? Is Seungcheol even aware that what he's doing is incredibly self-destructive? Jun doesn't have a clue. Neither does Mingyu.

 

"You were dehydrated hyung. And-And you hadn’t eaten a proper meal in at least a week," Mingyu treads, smelling the panic seeping into Seungcheol's sweet scent. Jun continues when Mingyu falters.

 

"We also found the cuts and bruises littering your body."

 

Seungcheol looks well beyond horrified by this point. He goes to explain himself, but Jun beats him to it.

 

"Don't say that this isn't what it looks like Seungcheol, because we all know it's exactly what it looks like." Jun states, putting a hand on Seungcheol's thigh.

 

"D-Does that mean you know about-about the  _pups?_ " Seungcheol chokes that last part out, wrapping his hands around his belly.

 

Jun nods, and Mingyu hums in confirmation. 

 

_"I-I'm sorry"_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> is this story worth writing anymore? i feel as though it's not :(


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> //tw for frank discussions of sensitive topics//
> 
> an analysis on cheol in which
> 
> jisoo overhears and  
> jun is a hypocrite 
> 
> hansol is remorseful; seungkwan comforts him
> 
> jihoon is assigned a mission

Jisoo is pressed flatly against the thin alabaster colored wall, listening to every word leaving his mate's lips. With terms such as _anorexia_ , _bulimia_ , and _self-injury_ being tossed around as though they weighed nothing.

 

It's painful to hear Seungcheol talk so indifferently about such topics, his view on it all clearly having been twisted early on, when his mind was first grasped by the slimly, clogging darkness. It makes Jisoo feel so god _damn_ guilty, having only known the bare minimum of his mate's suffering, like how he only would allow sex with the lights off, curtains drawn tight. Or how he refused to shower with Jisoo and Jeonghan, making up lame, opaque lies as to why he couldn't join the two. They simply brushed it off as one of Seungcheol's quirks, never dwelling too much into the real reasons for his strange behavior when it came to them seeing his bare body. Having merely chalked it up to plain insecurity, but now knowing the truth, Jisoo desperately wished he had prodded, if not the tiniest bit. Even if Seungcheol completely clammed up, Jisoo's shame would be a little more bearable with the knowledge that he _did_ attempt to help him, allowing oxygen to seep back into his grayed lungs.

 

But the reality is, he fucking _didn'_ t, and now he finally understands the saying that the truth hurts.

 

←

 

It would be a lie to say that Jun was surprised by Seungcheol's downward spiral into self-destruction. He'd seen all the warning signs, alarm bells ringing and flashing a bright red. Like how the older would play with his food for the solid duration of their meals, pushing and rearranging it on his plate, taking in small spoonfuls, chewing for what seemed like forever. Bringing a napkin to his lips, sneakily spitting out the half-eaten gunk into it. Or how he'd immediately excuse himself from the table, claiming that he'd drank too much. But when Jun secretly trailed the smaller male, he had heard the spluttering, heaving retching coming from inside the bathroom, the awful gagging making his own insides churn.

 

Next came the long sleeved jumpers, even in the sweltering heat of summer. Seungcheol never taking them off, despite the beads of sweat rolling down his temple, ears flushed from the heat. Jun noticing how the older would flinch, teeth clenched in pain when someone would accidentally grab his wrist, even the gentlest of touches eliciting a response. His suspicions being confirmed when Seungcheol's sleeve came down, flashing Jun thin, horizontal scratches. They weren't very deep, staying on the shallow side for the most part, but Jun knew what they could potentially become. _He knew._

 

They were both in the same boat, rocking lazily in shark infested waters, with no hope of swimming to safety. There being no way to beat the endless cycle of misery, almost not wanting to even, having grown so accustomed to their lavish (read;  _austere_ ) lifestyle.

 

Suffering from the same sicknesses. A mirror image, a reflection of an echo.

 

_In more ways than one._

 

←

 

"You didn't know Cheol-hyung was in pain Solie, so please stop blaming yourself," Seungkwan soothes, sitting down on the edge of the younger's bed. The lump hiding away under the covers not moving an inch, leaving no indication that Hansol even heard his mate's words.

 

"Sol?"

 

This time Hansol peeks his head out from underneath the pile of blankets, eyes shiny from crying, face splotchy with dried tear tracks. It breaks Seungkwan's heart to see his omega so defeated, normally radiating, bright appearance pallid and dulled.

 

"But it _is_ Seungkwan, if I had intervened then Cheolie wouldn't be in the state, he-" Hansol's voice cracks, and he trails off, silence lapsing between the two.

 

Seungkwan sighs, "Like I said before, _you didn't know_. You hadn't a clue, no, _we_ didn't have the faintest idea as to what was taking place behind the scenes. And while yes, we partially are to blame, it's no way our fault that any of this happened, _not at all_." The older then climbs into bed, bringing Hansol close to his chest, peppering him with kisses to his forehead, cheeks, temples, and scent gland. The steady pace of Seungkwan's heartbeat relaxing Hansol, his own heart rate slowing.

 

"Feeling a tad bit better Solie? Anything I can do for you?" Seungkwan inquires, Hansol murmuring something in English. "What is that sweetie? I couldn't quite understand you,"

 

"J-Just hold me Kwannie, that's all I ask."

 

Seungkwan does exactly that.

 

←

 

"I need you to search Seungcheol's room, I'm still taking care of Hannie, so I can't. And even if I weren't occupied, I don't think I could stomach what I'd find," Jisoo states, giving Jihoon pleading eyes. To which the younger alpha bites back a retort, chewing on the inside of his cheek.

 

He's apprehensive, but remains cool on the outside. Best not to warrant any superfluous concern.

 

"What exactly am I digging for? I need to know what I'm getting myself into," Jihoon replies swiftly, not missing a beat. Jisoo's face falls slightly, but he answers nonetheless.

 

"Anything that has the potential for Seungcheol to harm himself with, that's what I need you to confiscate and bring to me."

 

Jihoon's eyes widen momentarily, but his expression holds neutral, flat even.

 

"But I thought he'd stopped," He mutters more to himself than to the older. How did he not notice the rapid decline in Seungcheol's mental health? Sure, he'd seen the scrapes and bruises, but he just assumed it was due to Seungcheol's clumsiness. But now reflecting upon it, the pieces didn't fit, a chunk of the puzzle missing entirely.

 

"I thought that too, _we all did_." Jisoo voices, scent full of negative emotions. It makes Jihoon's mind spin. "So, will you do it? You don't have to if it makes you uncomfortable, I don't want to upset you or anything. I can just ask Wonwoo to if-" He's cut off by Jihoon's curt answer.

 

"I'll do it,"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh junnie bby ;-;  
> that's not healthy for you, especially in your...
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> ...
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> condition


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello i am back again
> 
> writer's block is a fukin bitch lololol
> 
> i love jun with all my heart  
> thank u for coming to my TED talk

"Do we need to take away his pens and pencils hyung?" Minghao's accented voice asks (Jihoon having roped Minghao and Seokmin into this fucking train wreck of a mess as well), holding up the stationary for the smaller to see, Jihoon pausing mid-search, looking up from the messy contents of the paint chipped drawers of Seungcheol's desk, Seokmin regarding the Chinese alpha quizzically.

 

"Probably not Hao, I-" Seokmin begins, when Jihoon cuts him off briskly, a distant expression on his face.

 

"Yeah, throw them in the bag," He says stiffly, vaguely gesturing to the huge trash bag, before turning back to his own work. Trying not to flinch too much when he pulls out a rusted razor blade, the double edged kind, accidentally nicking his thumb, a droplet of blood coming into view.  _Ignore it, for your own sake Lee Jihoon, he tells himself, but can't tear away his gaze from the stark redness standing out against his milky white skin._ "He can potentially use the nib to break the skin, not to mention eraser burns."

 

"Kay, well I think that's all for me," Minghao speaks slowly, moving away from the bookshelf he's stationed at. He and Seokmin both feeling the sizable tension hanging low in the air, the beta wanting to reach out to his mate, but too afraid to do so, scared of igniting the tiny alpha's temper. "You good hyung?" The question coming out as more of a timid squeak than a solid inquisition.

 

"Fine." Jihoon states through tightly clenched teeth, jaw working up and down methodically, like the metronome he uses when he's composing music.

 

"Are you sure-"

 

" _Quite._ "

 

→

 

"Are you ready for this? Like do you even fear what lies ahead?" Soonyoung remarks casually, the two standing awkwardly in the kitchen, Jihoon having just yelled something about throwing out all sharp cutlery, the older males getting the job done in a matter of seconds (mainly due to them just chucking out all the silverware, not bothering to even save the spoons, but no one except them really needed to know that), leaving them to just stare at the barren cupboards (it feels strangely mournful to Soonyoung for some ungodly reason).

 

Wonwoo tilts his head in confusion, Soonyoung barely suppressing a giggle at the comical way he does it, lips drawn in a pout. It reminds him of how Wonwoo would react after he kissed him, briefly musing over what a strange relationship that was. But he enjoyed their ride nonetheless.

 

"What are you talking about Soonyoung?" Genuinely bewildered, seemingly not having an actual clue as to what the omega is insinuating. 

 

_Are all alphas this stupid?_

 

"Don't play dumb!~" The blonde singsongs, cheeks squished cutely as he smiles, eyes tilted in his signature style. A layer of dust caked onto a shitty can of soup, _tomato basil_ its label reads.

 

"I'm not? Quit the theatrics and cut to the chase"

 

Soonyoung gapes exaggeratedly at Wonwoo's brusque bite, huffing before turning away, dramatically turning up his nose.

 

" _Fine_ , be that way,"

 

_C'mon, take the bait._

 

"Huh?!" Wonwoo retorts, now glaring at the shorter, his scent slightly ruffled.

 

_Bingo! Now to just real him in._

 

"Oh, come on Wonu! Surely-" Soonyoung starts to scoff, but the airy voice of the second oldest omega interrupts him.

 

"Do we have any watermelon left? Seungcheolie is agreeing to try to stomach some," Jun questions, bursting into the room, brow arching when he sees he two younger boys just frozen in place, seemingly ready to fight. "What the fuck? Am I intruding upon something?"

 

"No!" They both reply in unison.

 

Jun just shakes his head, muttering something in Mandarin, walking over to the fridge, swinging the door open, making a happy noise when he pulls out a bowl of the pink fruit. "Bye weirdos,"

 

"HEY!"

 

→

 

Chan sits in his and Soonyoung's shared room, unable to shake an uneasy feeling off of his thin frame, dread clinging to every bone in his body. Foot shaking nervously in his crisscrossed applesauce position, chewing at the inside of his already bloodied cheek.

 

A blush rising to the tips of his ears when he hears the moans and groans coming from the room over, the sound of the bed creaking and shuddering as Jisoo plows into Jeonghan mercilessly, the alphas probably caring less about being heard by the others. His two eldest hyungs being kinky lil' shits, his poor innocence long since stolen. Not that he particularly minded however. The filthy scene playing perfectly into his fantasies, awfully surprised when he doesn't feel a single ounce of shame at the prospect.

 

Imagining himself in Jisoo's place, with Soonyoung taking Jeonghan's.

 

The performance leader submitting entirely to him (with consent of course, Chan's not an asshole), spreading his flexible legs for him, Soonyoung's slick, tight hole presented for him to completely claim, _to wreck_. The omega's breath coming out in hot pants, breathy whines spilling past his kiss swollen lips as Chan sucks on the inside of Soonyoung's plush thigh, leaving behind an assortment of flowering bruises.

 

Nimble fingers slipping inside Soonyoung's wet, tantalizing heat, who positively keens at the lack of preparation, a strangled yelp being released. Nearly sobbing when Chan's rough pads brush against his severely neglected prostrate, the curling motion sending Soonyoung over the edge, thick spurts of cum spurting out over his lower belly. Chan smirking lazily when he realizes he made the omega orgasm without ever even having laid a single touch to his pretty little cock. _Fucking a_ _dorable~_

 

Only snapping out of his perverted daydream when he creams his pants like a school boy, an uncomfortable stickiness coating the insides of his boxers. The air of their room musky, the scent of sex (not really, but you get the point) everywhere. An odd scent accompanying it, one Chan's never smelled before, yet it's familiar all the same. Though he knows that there's some major difference, like- _ugh_ , he can't figure it out.

 

He hops off the comforter, going to clean himself up, when his door handle jiggles, and he's never been so happy to have remembered to lock his door.

 

"Just a sec!" He calls out.

 

"You dummy! You just presented!" Seungkwan's barks from outside, pounding his fists on the wood.

 

_Shit. Well it least it was rather anti-climatic, he supposes._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> before i go ahead and make junnie officially pregnant, i wanna know what y'all think  
> do u wanna see that? jun and cheol are my soft boys that i make suffer, even in my other fics, so yeah  
> i rly wanna, to let cheolie and junnie bond n shit but i dunno  
> heck now i have ideas ahHHhh
> 
> if u have noticed;  
> yes, the tags have some new stuff added  
> bc i love angst  
> a l o t
> 
>  
> 
> *FUCK HOW DId this become soonchan smut?!!!*  
> *And wake up wonu!!!*  
> AHHHHHHhhhhhh x1,000,000,000


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *there is a two/three week timeskip*  
> //putting a tw just in case//
> 
> no summary for me bc that'd spoil it and i want it to be dramatic as possible lolol  
> just know that it's p intense

"Keep it in your pants Channie!" Jeonghan barks, as Chan starts to snuggle closer to Soonyoung, the omega focused intently on the TV, which is playing some American movie Hansol insisted on watching. Seungkwan snorting loudly as the newly presented baby alpha flushes bright red, Jisoo sighing deeply at his mate from where he's preparing snacks in the small kitchen connected to the living room. Mingyu and Seungcheol beside him, pulling cans of beer out of the cupboard, the taller male swatting the leader's hand away with a hiss when goes to reach for one.

 

"You can't drink alcohol hyung," He scolds gently, momentarily forgetting that the older still hasn't told his mates the news of his pregnancy yet, eyes widening upon realization.

 

Unfortunately, this mishap doesn't go unnoticed by Jisoo, as he turns to the pair with pursed lips. Seungcheol wishing the floor would swallow him whole when he sees Jisoo glance at his belly for a split second, quickly looking away when he feels the omega's gaze on him. 

 

But just as Jisoo goes to say something, Jun flounces happily into the room, smiling adorably, Minghao following suit.

 

"Is the popcorn done? Cause Wonu is getting grumpy~" He childishly whines, pouting, Minghao giggling softly. Jumping up and down excitedly when the microwave beeps, Jisoo scrambling to take the bag out, yelping at the hotness. Seungcheol rushing over to check on his mate, taking Jisoo's hand in his, turning it over gingerly, examining it for any visible injuries. Leaning in close enough for the younger to smell his scent, perplexed when it smells softer, like it's been watered down almost. Like Seungcheol is—

 

Minhao waves a hand in front of him, snapping his fingers. "Earth to Jisoo? You okay?" Effectively bringing the alpha out of his trance, blinking owlishly at the Chinese male, before dismissing him.

 

"Yeah, 'm fine. Just daydreaming is all," He says unsurely, avoiding Seungcheol's stare, hurriedly pouring the buttery food out into a huge bowl, not bothering to take out the kernels. He shoves the dish into Mingyu's hands, gesturing for Jun and Minghao to gather up the drinks, all the while refusing to meet Seungcheol's field of vision.

 

"C'mon let's go watch the movie."

 

←

 

When the film finally finishes up, and everyone starts filing out the room, drowsily heading off to their beds, Jisoo pulls Jeonghan and Seungcheol aside. The angel of the pack looking vaguely annoyed, just wanting to snuggle up in the comfort of the nest, yawning tiredly. Seungcheol looking an awful lot like a deer in headlights from where he's clinging onto Jeonghan's arm, sensing that something isn't quite right.

 

"Let me go 'Shua, I wanna sleep," Jeonghan mumbles, attempting to push past his mate, growling when Jisoo holds firm, Seungcheol detaching himself from his mate.

 

"I'll just leave-"

 

"No, you won't. Stay," Jisoo interrupts, tone unexpectedly harsh, grabbing onto the omega's wrist. Causing him to whimper feebly, Jeonghan pushing the youngest male off of him. 

 

"Stop it!" He shouts angrily, glaring at Jisoo, "What's your fucking problem?!"

 

Jisoo merely shrugs, "What do you mean?" Voice clipped, pissing off Jeonghan even more.

 

"You know exactly what I'm referring to asshat!" Jeonghan cries, "You avoided him the whole entire movie! Even when he went to kiss you, you just turned away! You hurt his feelings!" He spits, Seungcheol starting to back away from the arguing alphas, genuinely scared now, seeing as he's never seen the two like this.

 

"Well what about me?!"

 

"The fuck!?"

 

"Seungcheol's fucking pregnant! And he hasn't even bothered to tell us shit!" Jisoo seethes, strong scent flooding the room. His kind and gentle demeanor gone, having vanished and replaced with pure hatred.

 

Jeonghan stills, fist clenched tightly as he turns to a trembling Seungcheol. "Is—Are you really...?" He trails off, Seungcheol staring intently at the ground, not replying.

 

After a few beats of silence, Jeonghan snaps. "Answer me goddamnit!" He fumes, Seungcheol's hand rising to his stomach protectively, as if he's afraid his mates will strike, wincing, already bracing for impact.

 

He weakly nods, confirming Jisoo's suspicions. "Yeah, I-I'm pregnant,"

 

Jisoo swears, muttering something in English, before he finally reverts to Korean. "How. Long." Is all he asks, the words coming out strained, short and choppy in size.

 

"H-Huh?"

 

"How long have you known."

 

Seungcheol gulps, "Two months, almost three." He responds, scent muddled with fear.

 

"Why the actual fuck didn't you tell us?!" Jeonghan screeches, face flush with anger, hurt radiating off him in waves.

 

"BECAUSE I WAS TERRIFIED OF HOW YOU'D REACT!" He screams, tears rolling down his cheeks, "I still am," He murmurs softly, wiping away the wetness on his face.

 

"I need to leave," Jisoo says, gathering his coat, heading for the door.

 

"W-Wait! Please don't go I—" Seungcheol tries to reason, but Jeonghan cuts him off rudely.

 

"Shut up! Can't you see you've already caused enough damage!?"

←

 

Wonwoo bolts upright when he hears the sound of a door slamming shut, the pictures on the wall rattling at the sheer force. The muffled sobs of someone—Seungcheol, he later learns—being heard from where he's laying, along with the noisy footsteps of another—Jeonghan, Jihoon tells him the next morning—racing up the stairs. But he's too exhausted to bother to check, choosing to cuddle up closer to Jun instead. Almost sucked back into the depths of sleep when he smells something very off-putting. A heavy, metallic odor invading his senses. Like a penny or quarter, reminding him of freshly spilled... _blood_. He jumps out of bed, throwing the thick comforter off him and his dreaming mate, heart dropping to the pit of his stomach when he sees the red liquid coating the bottoms of Jun's pajamas, dying the white fabric a startling crimson color. The sheets in a similar state, some of the fluid even having spilled out onto his night shirt.

 

And that's when it dawns on him, the dots finally connecting, the puzzle complete.

 

" _God you're so clueless Wonu,_ " Soonyoung's words echoing in his head, ones that he had scoffed at and simply dismissed.

 

Jun's pregnant—or _was_ pregnant—because by the looks of it, he was losing their pup.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> is junnie gonna be okay????  
> probably not :(  
> he actually didn't (or is it doesn't? //bc im still kinda wanting him to have the pup and not miscarry ahhhhhh//) know he was pregnant 
> 
> soo and hannie will come around  
> (or will they?)  
> they're just hurt that cheol didn't tell them n all
> 
> i rly love drama k guys


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> all i write is angst but i don't care lololol (nvm i secretly do and i hide my insecurities behind hip text lingo)  
> summ:  
> jisoo reflects ft.???  
> hospital visits suck  
> cheol why

Jisoo stares out at the murky depths of the river in front of him, chilly wind ruffling his dark locks. Teeth chattering, his lips tinged slightly blue, breath coming out in frosted puffs. Hand gripping the metal railing so tightly that his fingertips were white from the sheer pressure. Stars twinkling down on his shivering form, the worn concrete icy beneath his bare feet, having forgotten to slip anything on in his blind rage. The sound of the waves crashing against the rocks below oddly soothing, his mindset returning to normal, the reality of what he'd done sinking in.

 

_God I'm such a fucking idiot._

 

Seungcheol probably hated him and Jeonghan both now, which in all honesty, was fair, as they _were_ shitty excuses for mates, let alone the mates of a pregnant omega. They deserved nothing less than this. Perhaps an even a harsher punishment could be arranged. Removal of their bite mark? No, that-no, just no. Getting kicked out of the pack? Maybe that'd suffice, who knows. He makes a mental note to dwell on it later.

 

And while sure, it was understandable for them to be hurt, yeah, but what they did—more specifically the shit they said—that was crossing the boundary. They made their omega cry, they screamed at him, directed their anger at him, yelled profanities at him, even—

 

"You okay kid?" A slightly raspy voice asks, Jisoo whipping his head around to face the mystery person, swallowing his misery down so fast he nearly choked. 

 

The individual—a male of about Seungkwan's height—looked strangely familiar, like Jisoo had seen him countless times before, yet didn't know him personally. His pale skin illuminated by the harsh glare of the phone's flashlight he's currently shining on Jisoo, almond eyes boring into his own. Contact unwavering, holding strong, as if he were analyzing every aspect of Jisoo. Calculating the sum of his parts with pursed lips, frame soaked in a huge coat, hanging off his slumped shoulders, overall appearance haggard and beaten, yet Jisoo sensed that he carried himself with pride.

 

Strangely enough, Jisoo feels like he trusts the guy, despite looking so shady. It almost makes him laugh, because Seungcheol would be flipping out if he were here, Jeonghan not giving as shit as to whether or not Jisoo ended up getting stabbed by this fellow.

 

So Jisoo, being the logical person that he is, replies.

 

"Do you want the truth or not?" He says, the man walking closer to him now, offering him a cigarette, to which Jisoo denies with a wave of his hand. Thanking him nonetheless, the other male simply shrugging, muttering "Your loss," though he doesn't make a move to light one for himself.

 

"Whatever you feel comfortable with—" The guy pauses, glancing at Jisoo with an arched eyebrow, to which he takes the cue.

 

"Jisoo," He supplies, knowing fully well it probably _wasn't_ the smartest thing to answer with his real name, but fuck it, life's about taking risks. "And I'll be honest I guess. I said some pretty shitty things, made my mate cry, and then proceeding to tuck my tail between my legs, I ran off. Leaving him all alone to deal with our mistake." He winces at that last part, because their pup wasn't a mistake, not at all.

 

The man hums sympathetically, "That sucks." Leaning over the railing, arms dangling. A far away look on his face, like his mind is elsewhere.

 

"That's all you have to say?" 

 

"I'm not gonna sugarcoat, 's not in my nature. Because what you did _was_ low, and I _know_ that you're aware of such." He states somewhat firmly, straightening up, stretching with a yawn, rubbing at his eyes. "I'm not bashing you, because I understand. Sadly what I did was unforgivable, but you—you have a chance to make shit right again."

 

Jisoo looks at him quizzically, confused as to why this stranger cares, making the guy sigh and pinch the bridge of his nose.

 

"Your mate's pregnant, right?"

 

"Wha-How did you know that-" He starts, not remembering ever revealing that detail.

 

"I can smell it on you, but that's besides the point. Look, what I'm saying is that you still have a chance to make it up him. It's not too late to fix this, so do so." His voice cracking, hand fiddling with a white lighter, two faded black initials marking it. "Do what I couldn't do."

 

Jisoo nods, determined, "I will, I promise you I will." The words slipping out so easily, and he blushes. It's weird, because he actually feels pity for the other. Like he _needs_ to do what this man failed at, to make him proud. No one's ever invoked such a reaction before, not even his mates.

 

"Good luck."

 

→

 

"Wonwoo it hurts, please make it stop! Please Wonwoo please!" Jun babbles in the back seat, head resting on his mate's lap, Wonwoo stroking his sweaty locks, unable to do much more than that in terms of easing Jun's pain. The omega clutching his stomach feebly, the towel wrapped around his lower half gradually being stained a bright red. The fever Jun is currently running making him delirious, and Wonwoo actually doubts that he's aware of what's happening. He doesn't know if that's for better or for worse.

 

Soonyoung checking the rearview mirror every few seconds, watching his fellow omega with a heartbroken expression, Jeonghan in the passenger's seat, the scent of anger still lingering on him, arms crossed. Seungcheol having chosen to stay behind, breaking into sobs once again when Jeonghan refused to even so much as look at him.

 

"W-Will Junnie be okay?" Chan nervously asks, from the row behind, Minghao looking towards Wonwoo expectantly. Hope shining in his eyes, hope that this pup can be saved, that the pup will survive despite all the odds pitted against it, that everything will be alright.

 

It hurts. The chances are slim, and Wonwoo fears that it's too late now. He tears his gaze away from Minghao's own, not wanting the younger alpha to see the wetness lingering there. But he swallows his own worry down, focusing on reassuring the others.

 

"Yes Channie, he'll be just fine." He finally speaks, willing his voice to stay steady, determined to not let it waver.

 

"And the pup?" Hansol and Mingyu ask in unison, Seungkwan clutching his mate's hand tightly, knowing just how torn up he'd be if Jun lost the baby. Jihoon and Seokmin talking in hushed whispers beside them, texting Jisoo to hurry his ass up, that they were five minutes away from the hospital.

 

"I-I don't know," Wonwoo admits, Jun now crying out loudly from the intensity of the cramps, "I don't know."

 

→

 

"I'd like to book the nearest flight to Daegu, please don't inform the others, especially _them_."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> p sure u all kno who knocked some sense into jisoo and why he was there on the bridge ꒰๑•̥﹏•̥๑꒱ (the backstory i made for him makes me cry ngl)
> 
> also whether or not junnie miscarries is up to y'all  
> bc i literally am undecided
> 
> i'm going back to that shitty place where i feel like my writing it absolutely t e r r i b l e ugh  
> like i literally deleted five of my fics :(  
> i'm told that i'm amazing at writing angst (i'm 100% into this compliment thank u y'all i'm in no way complaining btw) but is this all i'm good at? do my happy fics suck then? i know i've made y'all cry, but do i ever make u smile? 
> 
> anyways, cheol is such a sweetheart and i love him and i want him to be okay and running away is never the solution to ur problems bby (ᗒᗣᗕ)՞


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> summ:  
> wonwoo??? a dad???  
> jeonghan and jisoo fuck up even more 
> 
> //putting a tw just in case//

Wonwoo paces anxiously, posture tense, warning everyone else to stay away, to just leave him _alone_. Scent heavy and thick, the air hard to breathe in, choking almost.

 

Seungkwan and Hansol talking in hushed whispers by the vending machine, every so often glancing back at the older. Mingyu and Minghao explaining the current situation over the phone to their manager, a permanent scowl plastered on the alpha's face while the omega just looks distressed, fidgeting with his sleeves. Soonyoung comforting a crying Chan, rubbing his back soothingly as he openly weeps. Jihoon and Seokmin asleep on the bench, leaning against one another. With Jeonghan and Jisoo nowhere to be found, not that anyone really noticed anyway.

 

"Jeon Wonwoo? Mate of Wen Junhui?" A small omega dressed in light blue scrubs decorated with smiling cartoon characters calls out as he runs over to them, one hand pushing his glasses back up onto the bridge of his nose, the other clutching an envelope.

 

Wonwoo snapping his head up so quickly it had to cause whiplash, Seokmin yawning as he shakes Jihoon awake. Minghao muttering an apology as he bids farewell to their manager, Mingyu latching onto his arm, very obviously shaken up about something. Seungkwan crunching loudly on chips, licking cheese dust off of his fingers, Hansol looking absolutely disgusted in his mate's behavior. Soonyoung dragging a blotchy faced Chan over to the circle, wiping his tears with his thumbs, pressing a kiss to his forehead.

 

"Yes?" He answers, fully expecting the worst possible outcome, certain that they lost their pup, unable to look the nurse properly in the eye.

 

"Here," Is all he says, pushing the envelope into Wonwoo's hands, "I'd love to explain more, but we're running low on staff." Rushing off shortly afterwards, leaving a stunned Wonwoo frozen in place, automatically taking the lack of response as a yes, that they did lose the baby. Jumping when he feels a hand on his shoulder, turning around to face Minghao, who's watching him sadly.

 

"Are you okay hyung?"

 

"I think so," He replies honestly, really seeing no point in lying to his friends, staring at the parcel in his grasp forlornly, unsure for once in his life.

 

"Are you gonna open it?" Hansol pipes up, asking the question that was on everyone's mind.

 

Wonwoo shrugs, "I don't particularly want to, but you guys can." Tossing the envelope to Mingyu, who fumbles to catch it. Slipping a grainy picture out of it, glossy under the hospital lighting. Seokmin looking from the picture to Wonwoo, and then back again, Jihoon arching a brow.

 

"Wonwoo,"

 

"Hmm?" Already walking off to the restrooms to cry, not trusting himself to speak for fear of his voice wavering.

 

"Look," The older alpha reluctantly doing so, fists clenched against his sides.

 

"There, can I go now—" But pauses when he finally takes in the print being held up, an ultrasound—one that cradled a little smudge of white in a sea of otherwise blackness— _his pup, Jun's pup—their pup._

 

"Congratulations,"

 

←

 

_"— _so y_ eah, we think he's suffering a miscarriage," Minghao explains, feeling Mingyu nuzzle into the crook of his neck, pressing against his scent gland teasingly, to which the alpha shoos him away. Resisting the urge to chuckle at the omega's adorable pout, sticking his tongue out playfully._

 

_"Good," Comes the response, Minghao's jaw practically dropping in shock, soon followed by pure anger. The strict filter he usually possessed completely gone, Mingyu shooting him a quizzical look, head tilting like a puppy._

 

_"Good?! What the fuck?!" He seethes, voice dangerously low, teeth bared even though he's unable to be seen from the other end of the line. Clenching his phone tightly, nails digging into his case._

 

_"Well, we can't have a pup messing everything up, now can we? It's for the best Myungho, trust me."_

 

_It makes Minghao want to scream out of sheer frustration, no longer caring if his snarls are heard by his ass of a superior._

 

_"But suppose he doesn't lose the pup? What would you do then?!" He retorts, figuring he's got their manager stumped this time, lips curving into a smug grin._

 

_"Simple. We'd force him to have an abortion." Not missing a beat, tone so uncaring, forceful even, red tinting Minghao's vision now, breathing deeply._

 

_Mingyu looking positively horrified, hand ghosting over his own stomach in sympathy, scent souring. Probably imagining himself in Jun's shoes, if judging by his saddened expression is anything to go by._

 

_Minghao opens his mouth to go off on the fucking bastard, when he hears Mingyu whisper, tugging on his free hand._

 

_"The nurse is here Hao, we probably should head over to where everyone else is."_

 

_He nods, muttering a half-assed apology, snappy as hell, but fuck it—he doesn't care anymore. Shoving his phone into his pocket, trying to regain his collected attitude, running a hand through his hair. Tugging on a few black strands, Mingyu swatting his fingers away, interlacing their hands together._

 

_"C'mon, let's go."_

 

←

 

Seungcheol walks sleepily down the hotel hallway of the room that he's booked, dragging his suitcase behind him, eyes drooping as he unlocks the door. Stepping into the chilly room, shivering as he sets his stuff down, dropping his backpack onto the provided desk with a thump, clicking the lamp on.

 

Ignoring the pang of emptiness he feels when he realizes just how alone his is, running a hand over the faint scar of his claim mark. Tracing the overlapping indents with his fingertips, remembering when they were put there. A tear rolling down his cheek, rubbing it away harshly, stomach grumbling at the same time.

 

Reaching into his bag, fishing out a simple granola bar, managing to finish half before he pukes. Dashing off to the bathroom, throat stinging when the acidic bile comes up, wiping his mouth on the back of his hand, shakily flushing the toilet. Slowly rising to the standing position, supporting the bump of his belly carefully.

 

Snuggling into bed when he hears his phone ring, reaching for it quickly, suddenly alert and wide awake.

 

"Hello?" He answers, voice small, so unlike himself.

 

"Seungcheol?" Comes Jisoo's soft voice, "Where are you?"

 

"I'm at home," Which technically _isn't_ a lie, because he _is_ at home.

 

"No, you aren't," Jisoo says, "Hannie and I just went back to the dorms, only to find your room empty."

 

"Actually I went out to eat," Backtracking fast, nervously wrapping an arm around his round tummy, knowing the pup felt everything he felt and then some.

 

"You're lying Cheol, I can tell." Jisoo replies, though he doesn't sound upset, which relieves Seungcheol.

 

"Sorry," He mutters, biting his lip.

 

"It's fine, just tell us where you are."

 

Seungcheol hesitates for a second or so, "I'm in Daegu."

 

The end of the line going deadly quiet, hushed whispers in the background, followed by something that sounds like crying (Jisoo's if he's being specific here). A long sigh and then another wail before the phone is picked up again, static blocky and choppy.

 

"I think we should split." It's Jeonghan this time, and Seungcheol feels his heart break yet again, feeling a muffled movement from the pup, barely noticeable really. "We need some time apart, this isn't working out. Perhaps you should invest in termination, I'll even pay for it.

 

Those words are the breaking point.

 

_He hangs up._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i was originally gonna have junnie miscarry, but i couldn't do it in the end  
> tho something else might happen as you read the manager's response :(
> 
> oops my hand slipped on the ending 
> 
> also jisoo had been thinking about breaking up prior (hannie didn't force this; even if he is an ass), but for different reasons than jeonghan mainly bc he feels awful for the shit he said to cheol, so he planned on staying away so he can't hurt him anymore n all  
> while hannie wanted to bc he's scared of being a parent (there's other stuff but we'll get there when the time comes)


End file.
